So, I confess. I have a case of blogger anxiety.
Way back at the ripe age of 14, I was a moldable, naive, passionate, and highly emotional teenage girl. I realize that statement is redundant within itself–because, honestly–is there such thing as a lowly emotional teenage girl? I digress. Anyway, I had a “no-delete-policy” when it came to blogging–or, back then–live-journaling. If I wrote something too vulnerable, or just plain whack, it stayed. Plus–the internet was not nearly what it is now, so I had much less to worry about. Hardly anyone saw the need to read about my thoughts besides my other 14-year-old emotionally-charged friends.
However, seeing as how many of my Facebook friends are now in high school (due to the nature of my job), I have began to ponder this insane phenomenon of feeling the need to broadcast every-single-thought-that-goes-through-your-mind for the internet land to see. I’m by no means against technology; how ironic would that be. I update my Facebook every so often, I have a blog, and I even think my Myspace is still in tact. But sometimes, I can’t help but think to myself, “Does anyone really care?” or, “Am I using this as a way to avoid making face-to-face relationships?” All of these were legitimate questions I asked while in the process of so many geographical transitions. I will admit it, 2-dimensional friendships are easier. There is no risk involved. If I don’t like something, I can exit out of it and walk away.
In a face-to-face friendship, though, you can’t do that. Even if you say you can, you know better. No one’s heart just cuts and runs. And along with that, there is this large part of me that wonders what friendships will begin to look like as our technology land grows bigger.
Will we even know what it means to confront people? Will we know what it looks like to have conversation about things that matter? Will we be able to express clear, well-thought out conclusions about things happening in the world around us? Or, over time, will we continually become consumed by this obsessive need to let everyone know what we are doing at the precise moment we are doing it (even if that means we are eating a stinking sandwich)?
I know it sounds harsh–but seriously, I think I speak for the majority in saying: we don’t care about a sandwich. Well, maybe some of us do. Okay, sometimes I think it’s interesting… sometimes.
With all that said, this has spilled into the things I write on here. Almost 5 times out of 10, I begin to write something, then think, “Eh, no one will care, and no one will read this anyway,” and delete it. I know what you’re thinking: honestly, Anne, no one thinks about this that much. You’re giving yourself way too much credit. I know, alright? I’m a weirdo. I overanalyze life on a daily basis and it doesn’t look like it’s coming to a halt.
I am not in any way, shape, or form against technology. I just worry that we are getting so used to a computer screen that we will in turn forget how to have real relationships with people. We have grown so accustomed to typing our feelings for the world to see that we don’t know how to express them with our closest friends. And this… well, I can’t deny it, it worries me. What will our generation look like in years to come? Will we know how to verbally communicate with people, or will we remain awkward Twitter-updaters?
Just food for thought. Seriously, feel free to disagree.