on unfortunate cravings

You know what the real downside of this Chick-Fil-A controversy is, on an admittedly selfish level?

I’m pregnant. And all I can think about are waffle fries.

I woke up this morning thinking about sinking a crisp waffle fry into one of their delightful ketchup packs, then sipping my Arnold Palmer in blissful glee. Then I remembered it was Chick-Fil-A Appreciation Day, and thought, “Well, shoot, there might be long lines. I still want waffle fries.”

And we went, and I think there might have been 200 people in the restaurant alone. I have no idea how many cars wrapped around for the drive-thru. And we even went early so I could be guaranteed said-waffle-fry.

People with cameras everywhere, posting and taking pictures for the world to see that THEY SUPPORT CHICK-FIL-A!!! Which at first was fine, but then it got really weird. First, because (vainly) I was feeling self-conscious, the one day I chose not to do a thing to my hair, my face might be plastered all over Twitter. Something in my soul was stirring and saying, “Am I making an extreme political statement because my craving for waffle fries has overpowered my ability to make sound choices?”  I heard people making all kinds of remarks about how “this will show them!” and all I kept thinking was how much I just wanted some waffle fries. And possibly a milkshake. But definitely a fry. I think the employees even felt a little uncomfortable, as they are, whether they want to or not, being made political statements just by serving people and doing their jobs so they can receive a small income.

So, to those on both sides–disgusted by those posting photos and supporting Chick-Fil-A, don’t hate me. Please. And to those waving their Institution of Marriage Flags, I actually just wanted some waffle fries, so if you see my frazzled, untamed hair in your camera phone, please–for the love of this world, do not post it. I love all people. All I wanted was a crispy waffle fry. And lots of ketchup.